When You Think You Can’t Go On Anymore

“I can’t go on, Lord. I have had enough,” I said to myself one Sunday evening. I placed a bottle of sleeping pills in front of me as I sat on my bed.

pills

pills (Photo credit: Mouse)

I had been depressed for several months. I was extremely stressed working in my job, and I was upset with God that I was still single. I was already in my 30s and still not yet married. My hopes and dreams were dashed.

For several months, I went through the motions of going to church every Sunday, and serving Him in full time ministry. But I felt that my life was going in a direction that I had no control over. I felt hopeless and all alone in this world. I was ashamed and didn’t talk to anyone because I felt family and friends wouldn’t understand.

I just wanted to go to sleep and not wake up in pain anymore. I cried out to God to take away my pain.

“I waited and waited and waited for God.
 At last he looked; finally he listened.
 He lifted me out of the ditch, pulled me from deep mud. He stood me up on a solid rock to make sure I wouldn’t slip.” Psalms 40:1-2, MSG.

During this time, God reminded me that I have an enemy, Satan, who would love to get credit for cutting my life short. But God showed me that my life was greater than my present circumstances, and what I was experiencing now, did not determine my future.

Life isn’t always fair, but God is just. I didn’t have the last say so over my life, He did, and my future was blessed. God begin to speak life into my destiny, to give me hope.

“The days of my life all prepared
 before I’d even lived one day.” Psalms 139:16, MSG

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11, NIV

Prayer of Healing

Father, I thank You that You are showing me that I am not without hope. Hope says that there is always the expectation of good coming to me. Lord, Your good surrounds me like a shield. Lord, help me to remember You are the only one that has the authority to give and take life. Forgive me for not honoring Your authority as I consider taking matters into my own hands. Show me the wonderful destiny and plans You have for me.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

When the Hurt Won’t Go Away

When my husband left me, I felt a deep and hurting loss…

All of us can remember a hurt that was so devastating that we seem to be unable to shake it. Sometimes, the hurt just doesn’t seem to go away. We have done all we know to do. We have taken all the steps and prayed all the prayers, but still the hurt continues every time we think about it.

Illustration of a garage door.

Illustration of a garage door. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

After my husband left me, I couldn’t get myself together and I went into depression. One day, I drove out of the garage with the automatic door still closed. I almost crashed through the metal door and broke the garage door opener. That was when I realized that I needed help. I went to the doctor to get pills to help me to focus, but that didn’t help. It only gave me a big stomachache.

Grief has its seasons. Even though I knew the process of inner healing, I needed help.

I went to a professional Christian counselor to deal with the feelings of hurt, anger and loneliness. Through consistent prayer counseling, I was able to get relief and the help I needed.

If the hurt has consumed you, and has taken over your life, it is time you seek out help. We are not placed on this earth by ourselves. From time to time, we need to get the right kind of help from others who can guide us over these difficulties.

Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” James 5:16, ESV.

Sin may be wrong thoughts or ungodly beliefs that you hold concerning the situation. Sometimes we are so close to our present situation that we aren’t able to get a clear perspective on it, and you need professional help. You might consider going to your pastor, counselor, therapist, or life coach.

Father, help me to be honest with You and with myself.  This pain is too much for me to bear alone. Let me not hide my pain any longer. Let me recognize when I need help.  Please lead me to someone who can help me walk through this.  Your Word tells me that You will direct and guide me by Your Spirit, therefore I trust You to direct me to that person.

In Jesus Name, thank You for meeting my need.